Monday, January 24, 2011
In a parallel universe
In a parallel universe, I am submitting Cvs after CVs in publishing houses and newspaper companies. I am certain I wouldn’t have to wait long for an ideal first job. After all, I spent 4 years honing my craft with a BA degree in Creative Writing and in Ateneo, at that.
In a parallel universe, I am flying in and out of the country, immersing myself in a variety of cultures. Because in my kind of career, imagination is everything and nothing fires up imagination more than experiencing new things in a foreign place.
In a parallel universe, I am single- by choice. And only because no man can tolerate my ever-changing whims, my relationship with books, my thirst for adventure and my constant need to be alone.
In a parallel universe, I am a free-spirit, blazing through each day without any plans for tomorrow. Hell, I don’t even know where I’ll end up in the next hour.
In a parallel universe rest all things I didn’t do, every option I turned my back on; it is where all opportunity costs get booked (sorry for the jargons). It is that ‘lifetime’ Jodi Piccoult was referring to when she wrote ‘Change of heart’. And I can go on and on, sentence after sentence, but Piccoult got it in one breath:
In between yes and no, there is a lifetime.
That lifetime will haunt you down on nights like this one; when silence is not called for and nothing else is worth remembering. That lifetime will pull you back to the roots you thought were long cut and thrown away. That lifetime has the power to make long- forgotten feelings re-resurface.
That lifetime can break you but there is a cure to the curse. That is, waking up to a reality that is far better than every alternative in all of any multiverse. Better, meaning, worth it.
These thoughts used to hardly ever visit me. But lately, they crash into my brain like a thief in the night. I wouldn’t go as far as using the word ‘haunted’, “reminded” is a more fitting term.
The idea of having made different decisions in a far-off planet reminds me of the several branched- out paths I abandoned. Seeing people who, in reality, tread on those courses sometimes mess with my brain. But at the end of the day, give me a rocket ship to that other universe and I’ll surely end up selling it to someone else.
For every YES are a hundred other NOs. A YES wouldn’t mean a thing if you couldn’t stand up for the NOs that come with it. The theory of a parallel universe is tempting; the concept of anything other than what is here and now is always hopeful.
But it isn’t real.
In a parallel universe, I am flying in and out of the country, immersing myself in a variety of cultures. Because in my kind of career, imagination is everything and nothing fires up imagination more than experiencing new things in a foreign place.
In a parallel universe, I am single- by choice. And only because no man can tolerate my ever-changing whims, my relationship with books, my thirst for adventure and my constant need to be alone.
In a parallel universe, I am a free-spirit, blazing through each day without any plans for tomorrow. Hell, I don’t even know where I’ll end up in the next hour.
In a parallel universe rest all things I didn’t do, every option I turned my back on; it is where all opportunity costs get booked (sorry for the jargons). It is that ‘lifetime’ Jodi Piccoult was referring to when she wrote ‘Change of heart’. And I can go on and on, sentence after sentence, but Piccoult got it in one breath:
In between yes and no, there is a lifetime.
That lifetime will haunt you down on nights like this one; when silence is not called for and nothing else is worth remembering. That lifetime will pull you back to the roots you thought were long cut and thrown away. That lifetime has the power to make long- forgotten feelings re-resurface.
That lifetime can break you but there is a cure to the curse. That is, waking up to a reality that is far better than every alternative in all of any multiverse. Better, meaning, worth it.
These thoughts used to hardly ever visit me. But lately, they crash into my brain like a thief in the night. I wouldn’t go as far as using the word ‘haunted’, “reminded” is a more fitting term.
The idea of having made different decisions in a far-off planet reminds me of the several branched- out paths I abandoned. Seeing people who, in reality, tread on those courses sometimes mess with my brain. But at the end of the day, give me a rocket ship to that other universe and I’ll surely end up selling it to someone else.
For every YES are a hundred other NOs. A YES wouldn’t mean a thing if you couldn’t stand up for the NOs that come with it. The theory of a parallel universe is tempting; the concept of anything other than what is here and now is always hopeful.
But it isn’t real.
# posted by Liana : 4:34 PM
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