Sunday, February 14, 2010

Legacy

Last night, I went with my dad to visit the wake of his bestfriend’s mom. She was already 87 years old, but her death was sudden. She wasn’t seriously ill months before, so everyone was left surprised. But, using her daughter’s words, God already gave her 87 long years. Who can ask for more?

During the wake, I couldn’t help but observe how Lolo (her husband) was noticeably miserable. He was usually very cheerful, silly even. But he couldn’t be like that, anymore; not when his partner for 67 years is no longer with him. That vision transported me to an image of another couple much like them: my own grandparents.

My grandparents have been together for 63 years. They are still healthy and very much alive, and we are, indeed, very thankful for that. Three years ago, on their 60th anniversary, they renewed their vows. And I must say, it was one of the most touching moments of my life.


….We planned for an intimate wedding. We wanted only those who mattered to our family to be there. But after we met with the Parish priest to schedule the wedding, the plans turned upside down. Rather than a small, quiet renewal of vows, he picked a regular Sunday mass, which is surely overflowing in attendance; because, according to him, the rest deserved to witness it. Most of us were hesitant. We wanted a solemn celebration, not a circus. But we were happy we trusted the priest and pushed thru with his idea.

On the day of the wedding, as expected, the church was definitely jam-packed. Only the aisle was empty of people. There were children crying, yayas running after toddlers. But when the wedding song began, everybody turned still and quiet. It was peaceful. More than that, it was heartfelt.

We did not have the usual entourage. Only their sons and daughters walked down the aisle with their husbands and wives. Following were the bride and the groom: my lolo and lola.

They were both in white. Lolo in his Barong and Lola in her terno. They walked down the 20 meter aisle hand in hand, ever so slowly, yet everyone remained quiet. They were making baby steps, looking at the altar where they first made their vows, while stealing short glances at each other. And I couldn’t believe my eyes when I looked at the rest of the church. People were teary-eyed. Actual tears, from people who didn’t even know our family. And when the couple reached the altar, people applauded. That point I realized what the priest meant when he said we had to share this glorious moment with the world…

Next year, we will be celebrating their 65th wedding anniversary. But really, there is no need to wait for that day for us to feel the rarity of a love like theirs. We’ve been experiencing it in every moment we spend together, every small family gathering, every gift-giving in front of our century-old Christmas tree.


Other families pass on businesses. Some, political powers. For us, it is the legacy of love, of loving what really matters and when it really matters, that is being passed on, generations from generations. And that, that makes us all feel safer in a place where love is usually superficial and forever seems nothing more than wish.


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