Thursday, July 24, 2008
I'll Never Be Like You.
Three years had past. Three short years; or was it four?
I had forgiven you a long time ago, even though you never asked for it, even though you never admitted your faults. See? That’s the scariest thing about you. You believe in the lies you make, and you do everything to make other people believe in them, too.
I got past all the pain you caused me. I was able to take everything back. I ended up, no, I remained, I remained happy, while you ended up lost- with all the lies and the drama you created.
People said I should have tried understanding you. They said you were beaten up by life early on. They said you didn’t have a normal childhood. They said your history was painful.
I knew all that, and believe me, I tried. I tried looking at things from your point of view. I tried to understand. But I failed. I guess I would never understand why a person would want to make someone’s life miserable. Perhaps, as miserable as hers.
You knew “pain” well enough not to pass it on to someone else. You should have never wanted to turn into the persons who hurt you. But you did.
As I’ve said, I have forgiven you. I was fortunate to be surrounded by people who knew me well enough- and knew you well, too- not to believe in you. But I guess I can never like you, and everyone else who’s like you.
Why?
I was strong enough not to be destroyed by you.
I was brave enough to stand against you.
But how about the others who aren’t?
And for them, I would never open my doors to you.
Now, you’re slowly creeping back into my life, slowly sucking up to someone you knew who would take you back. But I’m warning you, he has been at his best these past years. And I’m talking about the three or four years that you were completely out of his life. He told me he hoped you had changed. I told him I do, too, but I doubt it.
One of these days, we might bump into each other. When that happens, you don’t have to fear because I wouldn’t push you in front of a bus. Although I might think of doing so, I won’t-
because I don’t take pleasure in hurting other people. That’s you.
I had forgiven you a long time ago, even though you never asked for it, even though you never admitted your faults. See? That’s the scariest thing about you. You believe in the lies you make, and you do everything to make other people believe in them, too.
I got past all the pain you caused me. I was able to take everything back. I ended up, no, I remained, I remained happy, while you ended up lost- with all the lies and the drama you created.
People said I should have tried understanding you. They said you were beaten up by life early on. They said you didn’t have a normal childhood. They said your history was painful.
I knew all that, and believe me, I tried. I tried looking at things from your point of view. I tried to understand. But I failed. I guess I would never understand why a person would want to make someone’s life miserable. Perhaps, as miserable as hers.
You knew “pain” well enough not to pass it on to someone else. You should have never wanted to turn into the persons who hurt you. But you did.
As I’ve said, I have forgiven you. I was fortunate to be surrounded by people who knew me well enough- and knew you well, too- not to believe in you. But I guess I can never like you, and everyone else who’s like you.
Why?
I was strong enough not to be destroyed by you.
I was brave enough to stand against you.
But how about the others who aren’t?
And for them, I would never open my doors to you.
Now, you’re slowly creeping back into my life, slowly sucking up to someone you knew who would take you back. But I’m warning you, he has been at his best these past years. And I’m talking about the three or four years that you were completely out of his life. He told me he hoped you had changed. I told him I do, too, but I doubt it.
One of these days, we might bump into each other. When that happens, you don’t have to fear because I wouldn’t push you in front of a bus. Although I might think of doing so, I won’t-
because I don’t take pleasure in hurting other people. That’s you.
# posted by Liana : 6:27 AM
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