Highway to Happy

Never have I been away from my family for more than a weekend, yet, the dream of studying abroad has always been close to my heart. I’m not really a ‘traveler’ but the idea of learning things from a different perspective, in a brand new environment excites me.

Last week, I came across an announcement from the External Linkages Department. It was an invitation for the exchange student program in Singapore Management University (SMU). My heart started beating faster as I was basically staring at my dream. However, as usual, fear and nervousness got in the way, so I decided to think things over first.

I was, honestly, convincing myself to just drop it. I am two terms away from graduation and entertaining that kind of opportunity will surely mess up my schedule. I cannot afford to lose focus now.

But despite the lengthy list of why I should just forget about Singapore, I cannot get it out of my mind. Perhaps, this is one instance when I can’t pretend and say, “I never really wanted that, after all.”

Yesterday, I gave in to my heart’s plea. I mustered enough confidence and allowed my feet to bring me to Mr. Masilungan's office. I was really, really nervous to face him but there was something about the way he shook my hand that calmed me a bit.

After asking me some general questions (like about my course, year, CGPA, etc), he said something that blew my mind: “Perhaps, we can proceed with your first interview RIGHT NOW.

I was shocked and nervous and basically afraid of making a fool out of myself. So there I was, left with no choice but to pretend like everything’s fine when in fact I was almost not breathing!

It seemed like, despite the suffocating feeling inside, I was able to say something right. I passed the first screening and left the room with the application form in one hand.

Now that I have the key to my dream, I am left with one decision to make: will I use it?

My parents said it was okay. And I want to thank them for the willingness to spend a couple of hundred thousands for that (which can still turn into a couple of couple of hundred thousands since I have this feeling that my dad is planning to come with me). However, my biggest concern is TIME. If I will pursue my application, and modesty aside, I really think I would qualify, I wouldn’t be able to graduate in December. I would have to extend for a term and stay in school until April, then take the Board exam on October.

I am, at this point, just a short walk away from a dream, but taking that stroll would mean lengthening my journey.

Honestly, I didn’t have any intension of ending this entry with a statement. I wanted to post the question to everyone in the hopes of somehow finding the answer from others. But after really mulling over my choices, I guess it is best for me... TO STAY.


I will stay here, and finish the journey I have started, while I safely keep in my heart the dream of studying miles away from here.

I will fulfill that dream when I’m already armed with a CPA license under my name.