Highway to Happy

“I knew I was never going to be the pretty girl, so I just worked my way up to being the smart girl”. - Anna, how do I look?

My heart broke when I heard a girl, in t- shirt and sweat pants, said that. It must have smashed her heart when she uttered those words. The worse part was, she had the hammer in her hands.

I felt bad for her. I would have wanted to tell her she was pretty. That with a brand new style and a hair cut, she would be fine. I wanted to console her if it was possible. Surprisingly, I ended up whispering to myself: “she’s still lucky”.

She’s still lucky.
That even though she wasn’t known to be the campus heartthrob, she was recognized to be brilliant.

She’s still lucky.
That she was forgiven for wearing lame sweat pants and huge shirts because she was smart, anyway.

She’s still lucky.
That she was actually known for something; known for a label that could only go across her name.

She’s still lucky.
Because she wasn’t enrolled in any course in La Salle.

For 7 terms, I have managed to stay in the Accountancy program and maintain a spot in the Dean’s List. But those weren’t really what I was most proud of.

Three years of going in and out of DLSU’s gates, of walking around the campus, of speaking up when I want to, of actually looking at the eyes of the students I came across with, I am proud I’m still breathing.

Seriously, staying alive amidst people who can actually make you feel you’re worth nothing, without having the intention to and without having done anything to make you feel so, is difficult.

You may be pretty, but there are girls who are prettier than you are, and whose beauty is not subject to taste, but is absolute.

You may be smart, but there are others whose minds are more brilliant than yours.

You may be rich, but you don’t have that limitless credit card your seatmate got for her birthday.

Insecurity can cause someone’s death, in La Salle.

If you do not know your worth and you don’t know how to accept that you can never be on top of everything, you’ll lose yourself.

If labels mean so much to you, just like in high school, you’ll end up trying so hard.

Anna turned out to be stunning after the make- over. Her new bob, the slight touch of make- up on her face, her new clothes- she looked as if she was an entirely different person from the one who started the show.

She can be both the smart and pretty girl, now.

But if she still hasn’t changed her heart, if she still think so much of limiting herself and sticking to what people perceive her to be, she still can’t survive La Salle- and so the rest of the real world.



It’s not the façade.
Mango and Zara can do the trick sometimes; but not for long.